Update on the Great Stolen Lawn Saga

My day...well...remember how the town highway guys stole my lawn? One of the things they did wrong (that I complained about) was to leave my mailbox--which was hand-painted by one of my former artists with a big red dragon holding a little black kitten--sticking way out with hardly any soil around it. I was concerned that after a hard rain it might fall over.

So this morning at 8, I heard the trucks and went out to see what the "boys" were up to now. They said, "we're here to move your mailbox back." So I said, "well, okay." And they said, "So where is it?" And I turned around and the FUCKING THING WAS GONE. Yes, that's right. In the middle of the night, someone came and removed (sing it again) THE WHOLE DAMN THING (including the cement it took me an entire freakin' day to get right when I put the damn thing in all by myself...since I don't know squat about cement). Just left a hole in the ground, and me looking at the highway boys and the highway boys looking at me.

But no mailbox.

So. Let's recap. The town highway guys stole my lawn. And they left my cool mailbox hanging out. And someone else came and stole that. If these things go in threes, I may not have a driveway tomorrow morning.

Le sigh.

Big book deal any day now. That's what I'm telling myself. Big book deal any day now. Hello, universe?