Wednesday, January 3, 2018

Magic the Cat, Queen of the Universe



I'll talk about this a little more, when I can pull it together better, and have a celebration of her life (with giveaways, of course). But for now, I can say this:

It actually went as well as it possibly could have, under the circumstances. Heartbreaking, of course, but Magic—in her usual inimical fashion—made it clear that she was ready (while I was making breakfast, she walked into the kitchen, yelled at me, and then walked back into the living room to stand in front of the carry case where it was warming up in front of the pellet stove—of course, then she went and hid behind the couch and made me move it to fetch her out).
 
She even sat next to me on the couch as I ate breakfast, purring and letting me pet her, which she hasn’t wanted much in the last week. The folks at the vet’s were great, she clearly wasn’t afraid or upset, and my friend Ellen stepped away from her dog grooming in the back to be with me, which really helped. It felt like things had come full circle, since Ellen had found Magic, her mom, and brother for me all those years ago. Magic’s passing was gentle and peaceful and I was there with her (which might not have been true if that tumor had burst) and my vet agreed that we were seriously out of time (the tumor was so huge, you could see it pushing out her sides).
 
I am bereft, but I also feel like I made the right choice for the cat—for the first time ever in all the years I’ve had them, I picked exactly the right time. So in a way, we actually beat the damned tumor at the end. I’d asked for her to make it through the holiday season, which should have been impossible, given the size and volatility of the cystic tumors on her spleen, for her not to have a crisis while the vet was closed those extra days and to allow me to do what I needed to do at the shop. We had the long weekend to say our goodbyes, and she was so clearly ready to go. It was as good as it could possibly have been, for something so terrible, and my grief is tempered by gratitude for a kind universe and a stubborn-to-the-end cat. 
 
But oh my goddess, how I miss her already.
 
Last picture, this morning
 

26 comments:

  1. I know this was difficult for you. I, too, had to say goodbye to my one kitty this year. No matter what people say, they are our children. All my kitties and family are saying prayers for you.

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  2. Hi Deborah. My deepest sympathies to you in the loss of beautiful Magic. I just cried my heart out when I saw your Facebook tribute to Magic, and this blog post.

    Magic was a very special cat. I always thought of her with humour, every time I work with my Everyday Witch Tarot, and when I read your books. Her presence in your tarot deck is one of the reasons I bought it. We all have a little piece of Magic in our lives because of this, and she will live on across the veil.

    Blessings to you, to Magic on the Other Side, and to your other precious cats. And to Ellen for being there for you. May you be comforted by the energy of those who care.

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    1. I definitely am comforted by the great outpouring of love and support from my fans (and Magic's). It's true that she lives on in the tarot and many of my other books, and even in the little kitten named Magic who shows up at the end of Dangerously Divine.

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  3. I am so sorry for your loss. I send you moss for your tears and soft for your heart. May Freya carry Magic safely to the other side.

    Veronique

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    1. Thank you. This morning when I got up, the full moon was setting on one side of the house and there was a glorious sunrise on the other. I'm pretty sure that was the gods, telling me they were coming for my girl.

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  4. So sorry for your loss.Hugs to you

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  5. HUGS. I'm so sorry, but yes, as you said, for such as these things are, the timing was perfect--and I'm so glad you had these last few weeks with her. The fact she was so vocal about it being her time to go, that she was in a way ready to move onto one of her other lives, is inspiring in a way. Like an example of how to live...and how to exit gracefully.

    But none of that matters. I'm so sorry for your loss; and I wish for you comfort and blessings as you move forward. She was a very special kitty and will be missed.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you. And yes, it was. and she was, and will be.

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  6. Deborah, we are in tears, reading about the final moments of your beautiful Magic. We will miss her co-authoring, and clever thoughts in your future writings, and of course all the stories you've shared with us about her shenanigans. We're sending our love to you and your remaining kitties.

    Michele & Sara Kitty 💔

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  7. I feel your heartbreak. I was there myself a yr ago in sept. I still feel the loss but now that we've been adopted by a beautiful black stray it's getting smaller. May your heart mend and the hole in your days lessen. Hugs.

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    1. Yes, those first days and months are the worst. I lost Magic and Mystic's mother Minerva a year and ten months ago, and little Samhain 3 years ago this last December 28th. I still miss them, but I am slowly making room for whatever cats come next.

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  8. What a blessing that Magic crossed the rainbow bridge before the tumor burst! Sounds like a very peaceful passing. What a beautiful gift to give to dear Magic. Of course, you miss her but she's forever in your heart, with you in spirit, and will live on in your books.

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    Replies
    1. We really did get very lucky, even if I am terribly sad to have lost her.

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  9. Oh Deb!! I’m sitting at dinner in Vegas with tears streaming down my face. Everything you described as to Magic’s actions this morning were exactly the way it was with Avalon. Sending you so much love and sweet energies! BTW- I sent Avalon a heads up to wait for Magic’s arrival at the Rainbow Bridge. ❤️

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  10. TIGHT HUGS for you, and for Magic. Everyone's already said anything that I could have, and better worded. Be gentle with yourself in the coming days and weeks.

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  11. Thank you for sharing Magic's journey with us. I know you will cherish the good times you had with her. Take care of yourself.

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    Replies
    1. I've been sharing her with everyone for year--it only seemed fair.

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  12. I'm so sad to hear of Magic's passing. Our furry kids are a part of us,and stuff like this is beyond tough. Sending you virtual hugs!

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    1. Thank you. All hugs gratefully received. BTW, did you see that the heroine in Dangerously Divine has your name?

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    2. I'm going to have to read that! Ha ha!

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  13. Hmm it appears like your blog ate my first comment (it was extremely
    long) so I guexs I'll just sum it up what I submitted
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    I too am an aspiring blo writer but I'm still new to the whole
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    Replies
    1. Write what you know and what you love. It is that simple.

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